February 11

So last night hubby and i took the kids to the beach for somebody boarding..it was such a beautiful evening. as Suné jumped around in the shallow water, kicking about and totally filled with joy; brother body boarding with daddy a little deeper into the water, i couldn’t help but think what i have done to deserve such beautiful and perfect kids. they fulfill me in every way and i just want to get all emotional when i look at them sometimes.
so daddy decides he no longer wants to braai because its too nice down by the beach. back into the kombi we hop and daddy takes us to KFC. seeing that money is a bit tight this time of the year we decided on a family meal which was only R89.99, inclusive of a 1L coke. i had two of the 6 wings, a little chips and four bites of the mash...so i really didnt eat a lot. My friend came around at about 21:00 to bring me some chicken pie that she made, and i had a couple of bites of that...it was really great. but still i did not overeat nor did i eat more than 500 calories, so i should be good.
this morning i was 84.5kg. for breakfast i had half of a cheese and ham snackwich and half a cup of coffee. (with 1 sugar and low fat milk)
i bought the rest of the pie to work for lunch but Josh wanted to get something for lunch so he bought me a cheese and salami pie and i bought myself a raspberry cool drink. i have had half of the pie so far but contemplating the rest... i know i shouldnt eat it :(  now i have the chicken pie and the cheese and salami pie right here on my desk looking at me and it just seems so inviting... let me see how far i can go without it.
i swear i am going to start those pills on Monday. i just have to. i cannot look at myself anymore. i am so uncomfortable but i just cant help myself. Why does this stupid site not have spell check? i in small letters is so stupid and i dont feel like making I every time.
darnit.